Monthly Archives: March 2005

Reminders

Last night God showed up as a friend reached over and held me when I cried.  Yesterday the accusing voices were too much for me.  I needed to be reminded that God loves me.  So he did.

This morning I see God in the beauty of the sun rising in a clear sky, in the flight of the geese as they take off from the river, in the breeze moving the branches outside my window.  Like the promises of spring in the world around me, in the surety that it is coming, I am reminded of the constant presence of God. 

God stay close to me this day.  I need to hear your voice.  Silence the voices that want to drown you out.

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Psalm 124

   Psalm 124 (NLT)

    1If the LORD had not been on our side–
       let Israel now say–

    2 if the LORD had not been on our side
       when people rose up against us,

    3 they would have swallowed us alive
       because of their burning anger against us.

    4 The waters would have engulfed us;
       a torrent would have overwhelmed us.

    5 Yes, the raging waters of their fury
       would have overwhelmed our very lives.

    6 Blessed be the LORD,
       who did not let their teeth tear us apart!

    7 We escaped like a bird from a hunter’s trap.
       The trap is broken, and we are free!

    8 Our help is from the LORD,
       who made the heavens and the earth.

This happened to be my reading for today.  Sometimes when I am a bit lost I read the prescribed reading for the day, especially the psalm.  It seems to fit better than just reading them all in order, although I have done that too. 

I was thinking how well this one fit for today.  “If the Lord had not been on our side…”

If the Lord was not at my side right now, how would I cope?  If the Lord was not at my side right now how would I deal with a belligerent daughter whose hormones are somewhere off the scale? 

“If the LORD had not been on our side when people rose up against us,
they would have swallowed us alive because of their burning anger against us.”

That seems to sum up my life all too frequently these days.  But… there is that last verse that reminds me that God is my help – I am not alone.  I can lean on him and he will not get tired of holding me up.

All day I have been remembering this psalm.

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Easter Blessings

If you take a peek over at Randall’s site, you will get a look at what we were doing early this morning.  It was good, if a bit on the wintry side.  It really wasn’t as cold as it seemed last year when the snow had already gone.  But the sun – well saying it rose did require a bit of faith – but we were sure it was up by 6:48 as predicted.  It is always fun having everyone in to our home for hot drinks after. 

And there were a couple little spiritual treats to the morning.  My partner(business) apparently wanted to be there this morning.  I wonder sometimes at the circumstances that provide the incentive for faith to take small steps in the right direction.  It is good to see.

Then an Easter celebration.  To say that it was “good” to be there this morning worshipping with this community of faith that has become so close to me is an understatement.  I don’t have a word that describes the feeling of support by friends during a time of trouble.  The love shown to us by these people is as much proof of Jesus’ resurrection as the witnesses that saw him in person.  Jesus’ Spirit was there working through just ordinary transformed people saying his words to us, letting us lean on them right now.  And the other thing that I celebrated today was just the way that the fledglings are trying and starting to flutter their wings of faith.  I celebrate the fact we have people in our midst that are free to come and learn and check out what this whole God thing is about.  I hope we can show them how much we care about them too.

This afternoon was another reason to celebrate.  Dad got to attend church today and this afternoon we got together at the home to spend the afternoon with him.  We had our dessert together, visited in his presence. (He mostly stayed awake)  Then we brought out the violins and my recorder and we sang and played some of the old Easter hymns.  My kids stayed and sang along with the others, bless them.  Well the dessert was a pretty good reason to be there but they could have chosen to take off and not stay for two hours.

Then to top it off, I was napping on the couch and Grace came by. We had a good, not-angry, kind of mother – daughter talk.  Some stuff about pregnancy.  Some stuff about the boyfriend.  And a lot of stuff about faith, some differences that are important between our faith and the Muslim faith, and how we might explore together what faith in Jesus is all about.

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The Good Friday Chat


This morning I went to the combined Good Friday services that our church participates in.  Perhaps it was the hasty manner in which it was put together this year but it seemed more like a pep rally than a worship service to me.  Lots of singing.  Lots of exuberance in the service.  I know God was there but I just cringed a bit at the inference that it was so great so many Christians of different denominations could worship together – as if that was somehow so wonderful and not the norm to be expected.  Just wondered what we were all doing in there in our huddle cheering when the real game is going on around us outside the walls of all our churches.  I think I was looking for worship.  I needed to connect with God on a deeper level than what was going on.

But last nights service as we gathered around the Table was meaningful enough to allow me to ride a bit on the presence of God that was in that place last night.  It is hard to put into words the significance of serving the elements to friends who have become so close and who through our present troubles are standing by us.

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Soccer, soccer

This wekend Sara is off to play soccer in a tournament in Calgary.  I think the reason for entering the team in this tournament is to give them a chance to play in a larger venue – at least in theory.  I think it is more about the trip than about soccer – but maybe I am wrong.  I have to remember to put money in said girls account so she can live off healthy food for the weekend – like McD’s.  But remember, they are going to get plenty of exercise.  I hope she has a good trip and lots of fun.  The events of the past couple of weeks have been stressful on her as well as the rest of us. 

This afternoon I switched vehicles with my son so that he, wife and son could make a trip to Saskatoon.  I get the pick-up.  It has a few quirks.  CK brought it over to my office but forgot to lift the brake pedal – which for some reason turns the lights off. (do you think we might have a short of some kind?)  It was as dead as a doornail when I was done work.  So I had to get a boost.  David warned me about some other quirk but for the life of me I can’t remember what it is.  I expect I will find out and hopefully the trick to fix it will come back to mind as well.  Oh well – my grandson must ride in style.  At least in safety.

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Maundy Thursday

My daughter wretches and cries in the bathroom next to our bedroom.  I hear and want to wrap my arms around her.  She knows I am upset.  I was angry last night and now she won’t let me near.  It seems everything I do is the opposite of what I need to do or say.  I am so afraid for her.  I need the right words.  I need wisdom.  I need love that will meet her needs, not my own.  I need patience.  And I’m not doing so well with any of the above right now.  Yesterday ended badly. 

Today is another day.  Maundy Thursday.  It’s hard to go to the table unforgiven, apologies unaccepted.

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Let the day begin.

This was part of my reading this morning.  I have been reading through the accounts of the events leading up to Easter in all the four gospels.  This last week – Holy Week – I am in the account recorded for us by John.

John 14:27 (NLT)
 I am leaving you with a gift–peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give isn’t like the peace the world gives. So don’t be troubled or afraid.

It came to mind that the peace the world gives and seeks – is the peace of a trouble free life.  Jesus stated this  to his friends just before he is betrayed and the whole chain of events that make up the last days before his death begins.  So this peace he speaks about is not freedom from a difficult life.  I think he is speaking about the fact that he left us his spirit – he did not leave us alone.  We are not abandoned to exist only in the physical world.  His peace transcends the circumstances we find ourselves in.

“So don’t be troubled or afraid.” 

This is not an easy kind of peace.  I am beginning to see it though.  And all I have to do is remember this one day at a time.  I don’t have to see the big picture or the end results of everything.  He’s walking with me through today.

So let the day begin.

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