Daily Archives: January 28, 2004

Women, leadership and trust

There seems to be a lot of talk about women in positions of leadership in the church emerging or not.  And on how men and women can or cannot be mentors to each other.

 

As to leadership – we don’t check our brains at the door of the church you know.  We come with all the skills and talents we put to use out in the big old world business savvy,  ability to create, abilities to work with people, abilities to nurture and lead others, even abilities to use technical skills, etc, etc.  We can do pretty much anything we wish to do and often can do it better than a man.  Just as men can do pretty much anything they wish to do and often can do it better than a woman. 

 

The only roles where we cannot cross over are specific biological ones related to gender and reproduction.  Pretty much every thing else can be done by a person of either sex. The job may be done differently but still be well done. 

 

In spite of a lot more restrictive traditional roles of women in the world of New Testament and Old Testament culture, women played a variety of roles from prophetess to mother.  And Jesus didn’t let the men around him put women down not a single example that I can think of.  On the other hand the Pharisees and leaders were always being put in their rightful places. 

 

If God created us to have all these abilities and skills, does it not make sense that he would expect us to use them?  I believe God calls women to do things for him as loudly as he calls men.  An obedient woman should follow God’s call in spite of obstacles the world puts in her way. 

 

There are women where it is very obvious God has called them into ministry and blessed them with special gifts in this area.  But there are not many women in ministry relatively speaking and if there is no one available to teach me does this mean that I should not be led into a deeper relationship with God by discussing my faith one on one with a male pastor or friend? 

 

I know the dangers.  But if there were no female physicians and I was ill or in need of medical advice would I not go to a male physician?  I know there are strict standards of ethics and would expect him to abide by those.  I also know that a male physician is aware of the risks and takes precautions to protect himself.  Intimate one on one sessions would be taking a risk and could result in disaster.

 

In my profession, when I go to meetings, I often will find myself sharing information with a male colleague after all, women are still in the minority in dentistry too.  I don’t know that I would put myself in a position where I would go off into a bar with a male colleague in a one on one situation unless I knew the guy well.  If I knew him well and went anywhere with him it would be because I trusted him.  I also would have to trust myself.  My choice to be joined to and love one man is serious and I know that I will not violate that promise made to my husband.  I trust myself to keep this promise.  My husband trusts me too.  This mutual trust gives us a lot of freedom to be with people of the opposite gender without feeling that by entering into deep discussions or a one on one situation we are somehow violating our exclusive relationship with each other.

 

I would hope that pastors and others involved in ministry (male and female) could have this type of relationship too.  A freedom to be with other people because they know they can be trusted to keep promises of fidelity to a spouse, to themselves and to God. 


Thats a bit of a long rant – but off my chest!

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Parenting

Parenting is such a complicated job.  Just when you seem to be going along well, up comes some huge snag and all the answers you thought you had just don’t seem to be relevant any more. 

All I really hope to do is give my kids a solid basis on which to make good decisions.  But it seems that I come across as grumpy half the time and who wants to follow a model that is grumpy?

It is so much easier to be a dentist than a parent.  I do what I know how to do – what I’ve been trained to do.  I can do it well and I can find out how to do things if I am uncertain or if there are new methods.  I have textbooks, continuing education courses and lots of information.  So I can confidently do what I do to the best of my ability and feel good about it.

I have no idea if I am doing the right things as a parent.  I barge in and do what I think is right and seem to make mistakes left, right and center.  And I have no idea if I am actually making mistakes even. 

Anyone have the latest manual?

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